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The Rights & Duties Towards Parents - Part 1

The following is the introduction of the upcoming English translation of the book 'The Son - With his Father and Mother' by Sheikh Yousuf Baadarani (May Allah protect him) from Revival Publications

Introduction

Young and as an adult, I was near my father and mother, I could do without this world and its comforts. My father (May Allah (swt) have mercy upon him) was one of life's great schools. He was merciful to people and with them as if he was a walking heart, pure and purified of wickedness and meanness in his speech and deeds. He lived eighty years with a pure tongue, no one ever heard him utter an obscene word. In his eighty years no one knew him to have done a bad thing, always abstaining from anything improper, striving to do good and reconciling adversaries.

He used to speak to me about his relationship with his father, how he had raised him, and how he did obey his father. May Allah (swt) have mercy upon him, he had no mother for she died when he was an infant, but his father loved him and brought him up well. Every time his father used to order him to do something and my father was reluctant to do it, his father would tell him "do that and I will be pleased from you and bless you. If so, by His Grace promise I guarantee you bounty from Allah (swt) in this life and paradise in the Hereafter. On other occasions, his father used to tell him "do what pleases me my son and Allah (swt) will do what pleases you in this life and in the Hereafter". Every time-my father (May Allah (swt) have mercy upon him) would say-I used to do without hesitation what my father used to ask me to do, he liked asking me to do things. It seems to me as if Allah (swt) had clothed him with the light of His blessings in this world, for everyone who knew him loved him. Allah (swt) has distinguished him with people's love, so they loved him with gratitude and brotherhood for his fame in his honesty and integrity, through his reputation without ever seeing him. Allah (swt) Most High distinguished the Prophet Yusuf with beauty, kindness and purity when He protected him from falling into the satanic temptation. Allah (swt), Glory be to Him, bestowed on my father a natural disposition for integrity which in my whole life I have not seen its equal from any other man. Allah (swt) honoured him with His good pleasure in this world, it was like an announcement to people that he will be among those forgiven on the Day of Reckoning, and out of dutifulness to him, I beg the Exalted in Might, the Forgiver, to grant him that.

As for my mother, she was absolutely obedient to my father. She used to guard his secrets in his absence, talk about his good qualities, and never leave the house except with his permission. She was keen to do what he liked and refrain from doing what he disliked. She obeyed Allah (swt) in her life with him, loved him, was extremely loyal to him and was generous and giving in trying to make him happy and in raising us on obeying him.


Her loyalty reached to the point that for tens of years of her marriage she invoked Allah (swt) to let her follow him if he died before she did. Her invocation was answered when two months after his death she followed him, even before finishing half the prescribed period of mourning for a wife; maybe souls do meet before they are resurrected. She was an example of a wife's devotion to her husband.

By this great love I have for them, and in order to extinguish the fire of lamentation in my heart, and as an atonement for my failure in not being sufficed of enough Godly reward for dutifulness to them. In fulfillment of my duty to the new generations of Muslims, I found this search into the jurisprudence of dutifulness and undutifulness toward one's parents to be an urgent need for every son and daughter wishing to gain a bigger share of the reward for obeying Allah (swt) through obeying the parents, if the opportunity is still favorable for completing the fortification of the Muslim family so that through it Allah (swt) will defeat Satan and so that it will turn into a fortress which protects the tenets of Allah (swt)'s religion on this earth. What encouraged me to write about the subject of dutifulness to parents is my reading of the book "Kindness to parents" by Abu Bakr al-Tartouchi, verified by Muhammad Abd El-Hakim al-Kadi from the Muassassat al-kutub al-thakafiah publishing firm – Beirut. And the book "Kindness to parents" by Abu Faraj, Ibn al-Jawzi, verified by Muhammad Abd El-Kader Ahmed Ata from the same publishing firm.

Ibn al-Jawzi says in his introduction: (so I saw that I should write a book concerning legally binding matters, so that the heedless will be awakened and the prudent reminded. I have arranged it into sections and chapters, may Allah (swt) guide me to do what is right,) the end. But upon reading the book, I found that it is merely a listing of the sayings of the Prophet (hadiths) with no explanation worth mentioning and some narratives of righteous and pious people handed down through tradition. I found also that the verifier -may Allah (swt) forgive him- did not bother to point out the weakness of many of the hadiths found therein as al-Kadi pointed out in his verification of al-Tartushi book (may Allah (swt) reward him for it). The verifier Ata was satisfied to mention the narrators of hadiths and its sources without paying attention to the viability of the hadith or to its weakness. That is why we have relied in most of the hadiths we cited on the verification of al-Kadi in the Tartoushi book. However, we have used very few hadiths described as weak, pointing out that when citing one of them, and that was for two reasons:

1- Because it is concurrent with a sound strong hadith.

2- Because it is concurrent with correct Islamic understanding of the subject under study.

We did not consider it a basis for understanding because for that we must have an ayah (a verse of the Qur'an) or a correct hadith or the consent of the Prophet's companions (May Allah (swt) be pleased with them). We didn't even consider it as a proof because we have at our disposal the correct hadith concurrent with it. For the two books were mainly made up of listings of the Prophet's hadiths concerning dutifulness to parents, maintaining good relations with one's relatives and undutifulness to parents, and neither of them can be considered as a book treating these subjects. I was amazed to read in the Tartushi book "kindness to parents" what he wrote concerning thankfulness and dividing it into three categories: Thankfulness in the heart, thankfulness on the tongue, and thankfulness with the limbs.

I found the verses which he cited from the Qur'an as an illustration to his division of thankfulness to have no relation to these divisions nor can they be used as a proof of any division. Thankfulness itself is a deed and a duty imposed from Allah (swt), therefore it is one divine command, indivisible, because it is similar to all the other obligations carried out after faith has become firmly established in the heart, either by the tongue through advocating or with the limbs, by adhering to it in action. Therefore the divisions he made are in reality the manner in which all legal duties are carried out: belief and action by words and deeds. This is the way to express thankfulness. I can only explain the division he made as the result of being carried away in his explanation and I don't believe he wanted to say it is part of Islamic jurisprudence.

The subject of kindness to parents is part of the subject of life and of the point of view of Islam concerning life. It holds special importance at this time, the time of isolating Islam from the mainstream of life. The time of purposely keeping Islamic thoughts and concepts from influencing the way a Muslim lives. The time of banning actual adherence to Allah (swt)'s religion, the time of living totally in the obedience of evil and under its total control of all aspects of our lives, whether moral, financial, educational, social or political. At this time of total assimilation into currents lost in aberrance, a time in which the Islamic Ummah (the community of Muslims) lives like sheep; one generation after another dies without any of them leaving a trace that they had lived in the obedience of Allah (swt). Each generation after the other or rather each individual of one generation after the other dies the death of ignorance prevailed before Islam. That he died without pledging allegiance to any Caliph ruling in accordance with the great Qur'an of Allah (swt), the traditions of His Messenger, Muhammad, the son of Abdullah (peace is upon him) and the consent of his righteous honoured companions. Yet, he is accorded funeral prayers, and mercy of Allah (swt) asked for him, as though he died after a life lived in accordance with Allah (swt)'s religion!

The Prophet (peace is upon him) used not to perform funeral prayer for a believer who had died owing money, no matter how small is the amount. His honourable companions refrained to perform funeral prayer for a believer who died without carrying out the hajj to the House of Allah (swt) at Mecca. All of that, while the rule according to Allah (swt)'s religion was present, and the Caliph, successor of Allah (swt)'s Prophet (peace is upon him) was at the head of the state. Ruling according to the injunctions of Allah (swt) and His Prophet, raising the banner of Jihad, working day and night to uproot the systems of unbelief and to establish the rule of Islam. Carrying Allah (swt)'s call to Islam through actual application of the rules of Allah (swt)'s religion among people in their relationships, in solving their problems and in their entire daily concerns and affairs. While all the people are taking upon themselves the call to Islam by actually applying its rules in every case, concern, relationship, issue, need, desire, emotion, idea, deed, movement, wherever they settle and whatever they encounter

At this time, the time of the rule of evil, the human Satan, evil refuses to let us organize a single relationship or solve a single problem according to our religion - which we claim to profess - the religion of Islam. Not because he hates us, for Satan hates the believers who adhere to Islamic rules, as for those whom he succeeded in convincing that they are believers while they do not adhere to life of Islam, to its thoughts and rules, these are his lovers whom he truly loves. And they are his worshippers who believe him and who obey him in every matter and accept his every word. For he raised them to go through the journey of life and to deal with its concerns in ways other than the Islamic way, not adhering to the tenets of Islam but convinced that they are Muslims and are adhering to Islamic teachings.

At this time, we present dutifulness to parents. A subject, an entrance to a life of belief for subsequent Muslim generations so that they would chose a new path for their lives other than that of those who submitted to and accepted the rule and domination of other than Allah (swt) over their life and death. And a gateway to living the life of the companions of the Prophet (peace is upon him, his family and his companions until the Day of Resurrection).

The lives of the companions of the Prophet (May Allah (swt) be pleased with them) were dedicated to the obedience of Allah (swt). For when they were praying facing Jerusalem and learned that Allah (swt)'s decree has descended making Ka'bah their Qibla (their direction in prayer), they turned in their prayer to face Ka'bah rather than continue facing Jerusalem, not one prayer in the disobedience of Allah (swt). So they performed part of their prayer facing Jerusalem and the remaining part facing Mecca. And then while they were drinking wine, they heard the caller for guidance and faith announcing that a divine revelation was sent down to the Prophet declaring the drinking of wine unlawful, they did not finish swallowing what they had in their mouths. They poured the wine out of their glasses, spat it out of their throats and broke its jugs until the wine streamed down the alleys. And if any of them was with his bride on that first night and the caller to heaven called to Jihad as a short, fast or rather swift way of getting there, the bridegroom would leave his bride, hurrying in taking his purification bath. And in his ablution and prayer and in his farewell, light of burdens, indifferent to what he has left behind. Looking forward with haste to victory from Allah (swt) or martyrdom, fighting the armies of the heathen in order to spread Allah (swt)'s mercy by placing people under the rule of Allah (swt)'s justice. Generations lived in belief, raising the banner of ‘there is no God but Allah (swt) and Muhammad is His Messenger’ and died bearing witness to Allah (swt)'s oneness, with the commitment to abide by Allah (swt)'s rules in every matter and every case.

Our present generations are living in aberrance, they essentially abandoned all of Allah (swt)'s religion, even if they perform their prayers, fast, erect mosques, pay their zakat (obligatory almsgiving), and perform their hajj (pilgrimage to Mecca). They abandoned the call to Islam when they abandoned their adherence to Allah (swt)'s rules. Because the root of following all the tenets of Allah (swt)'s religion, of the Qur'an, and of the traditions of the Prophet (peace is upon him) is dependent on having as a ruler a caliph who would rule according to the Islamic system. For in the absence of an entity ruled by the Islamic system, evil, Satan's foster child, will rule.


If the preceding generations had adhered to the tenets of Islam, evil would not have continued to rule and dominate us, not for a single day. Because establishing the rule of Islam is an obligation imposed by Allah (swt), it is an Islamic legal matter. And every legal matter has a legal manner for its application imposed by Allah (swt) and His Prophet; so what if a rule and a duty is at the basis of all of Allah (swt)'s rules for people and among them. The Prophet (peace is upon him) established Allah (swt)'s rule as soon as the Muslims became capable of adhering to the rules of their religion and as soon as the Qur'anic revelations descended from Allah (swt) dictating the Islamic system. when the revelation descended on the Prophet (peace is upon him) explaining Allah (swt)'s rules and system through the Prophet's speech, deeds, and things he kept silent about.

Dutifulness to parents is a call addressed to all Muslims asking them to stop a moment and accept Islam the way Allah (swt) wants them, and orders them by to adopt in comprehension and application. One rule after the other in one matter after the other, whole, encompassing all their lives' concerns; putting their lives in order with its rules and solutions to their affairs and problems. In order to change their lives from living under Allah (swt)'s wrath and displeasure to a life of obedience to Allah (swt) and His Prophet (peace is upon him). In their striving to earn His good pleasure, of aspiring for His forgiveness and mercy, and for the reward of an eternal life in His paradise.

Adhering to Islamic rules, is what turns life into an Islamic life and transforms society into an Islamic society and changes the system of government, which stems from satanic suggestion and thought. The system which rules according to blasphemy and drags the Ummah toward a doomed fate, the hell of the misleader and the misled of this life. And in the Hereafter, on the threshold of a Hell-Fire which was made to burn fiercely by the Avenger, the Supreme Power, the Creator of the universe, and of every animal, plant and inanimate object. The Satan of every individual stands before him, making fun of the stupidity of his follower, ridiculing the insignificance of the one who left Allah (swt)'s religion in this life and believed his deceptions and lies and followed his temptation, and tells him "... I had no authority over you, except to call you, but you listened to me..." Holy Qur'an 14: 22.

After reading and comprehending the injunctions concerning kindness to parents found in the verses of the Holy Qur'an, and in the sayings and traditions of the faithful Messenger (peace is upon him). The wise son who understands what he reads cannot but immediately and before finishing the reading of this book, change into a dutiful son if he was not so due to his ignorance of the principles and rules concerning kindness to parents. Or into a more dutiful son to his parents if he was so through a natural disposition given to him by Allah (swt) to do well and obey his parents. This immediate transfer to obeying Allah (swt)'s injunctions in a matter that the Muslim was ignorant of Allah (swt)'s rule is the repentance accepted by Allah (swt) through this mercy for the obedient. And is the only way to adopt Islam in the manner ordered by Allah (swt), and is also the only way to make faith and striving to earn Allah (swt)'s good pleasure prevalent in all of life's concerns. It is the way to carry the call to Islam to be firmly established, clearly explained and taught in Muslim countries, and to call non-Muslims to adopt the Islamic religion through understanding and application in life's matters. It is alone the way for the advancement of Muslims, because for the nation to adopt a certain point of view of life, adherence to the thoughts and conceptions connected to it. And whatever stemming from it of conceptions and mental rules of behavior, is the only path for the advancement of nations, their advancement being tied to the refinement of the principle they adopt.

Thus nations move in their decline and deviation from the ascending line relative to the measure of their deviation from its principle and abandonment of it. The Muslim Ummah having in reality abandoned its Islamic principle as a point of view of life, code of conduct, and systems for life's activities. We find it to have become a nation that has reached the lowest levels of decline that a nation can reach because of abandoning its principle. It is true that the unbelieving nations live in a depraved condition much baser than that of Muslims but that is a measure of degeneration by Islamic standards and not by standard of their principle, for unbelief is the basest level a human being can reach.

Hence we see the unbelieving nations exercising total authority over Muslims. Dominating their existence and the formation of that existence. Imposing on them their systems of rule and their laws, imposing the bad application of those systems and laws. Dominating their human resources and wealth, making plans to build up and manage those resources and the channels for spending that wealth. Dominating every aspect of their public lives, every one of their capabilities and the direction their lives should take in order to keep the Muslim Ummah in life's quagmire in which it lies. All of this is due to the adherence of these unbelieving nations to their principle of which is how to spread their ideas in order to secure its dominance. This adherence to their principle, no matter how corrupt or unsuccessful in dealing with the facts of life, makes it imperative to constantly go forward forcibly in achieving those aims. No matter how base are the roots of those thoughts; and because of that forward force, none of its masters notice how corrupt it is and how failing are its proposed solutions. While we the Muslims are people who have abandoned their principle and became an Ummah without a method for moving forward first. As Islam as an ideology for life is a way of life, a system of relations and solutions of life's matters that stems from it holding the same dogma. And because its values and its aims are defined by Allah (swt) Who defined its dogma and sent down the details of its system in the form of revelations received by the Prophet (peace is upon him). It is the only doctrine that moves the one who adheres to it with an ascending rising force rather than a forward force. When they abandoned Islam as a complete, independent and distinct way of life, they lost the direction of its ascending rising path secondly.

The one who is on an ascending path, if he does not continue to recharge his energy with the necessary force to resist the degree of height he reached, will soon be incapable even of staying at his position. Will fall downward with a force equal to the pressure exerted by the degree of height he was at, and will not stop until he hits bottom, this is the state in which is living the Islamic Ummah with all its different peoples. The Islamic Ummah will remain at this bottom it reached in spite of all the attempts to make it rise without the awareness of and the adherence to the tenets of Allah (swt). That is without adopting Islam as it is in reality, a dogma and a basis for all thought and a system for all of life's matters. Every attempt to make it rise and every call for its regeneration - and hundreds of attempts and thousands of calls were made - using thoughts and methods other than the thoughts and methods of Islam is a call with Satan behind it. Because it is a call and an attempt of falsehood, mere calls to diverting and blinding the sights so that the path for the real advancement of Islam will not be recognized. All of these are outlets through which to channel the renewed vigor of the Islamic Ummah and to lessen the surge of piety passed on from one generation to the next. Attempts of betrayal of Allah (swt)'s religion and its people and a conspiracy to keep the Muslims from following the right path. Every Islamic call through a way different than the Islamic way is a deceit to Muslims. Even if it were opposed by the rule of falsehood, as a deception, on the ground that it is Islam. So people would believe it because of their ignorance of the conspiracies of the human Satan, that it is the right path so that they would support it as Islamic, while in fact a human Satan controls it. It would then be a mere ferry for Muslims from a stable guarded by unbelievers to a stable guarded by those who pretend to be Muslims and pious; and the Muslims will remain in the new Satanic stable at the bottom in which other Muslims live in other stables.

Indeed, dutifullness to parents is a basic duty in Islam, but as with any other Islamic duty, if the Muslim carries it out because Allah (swt) ordered him to and in the manner ordered by Allah (swt) and His Prophet, then it would be a deed and a life lived in faith. But if he does it for a reason of which he is convinced other than that it is a duty imposed by Allah (swt). It would be a deed done for the sake of the deed objective and not for earning Allah (swt)'s good pleasure by carrying out His commands, would be a deed and a life lived in unbelief. For the result of a deed is realized no matter what is the ideology that deed was based on. However, the deed of faith cannot be realized except by combining the belief in faith which is complying with Allah (swt)'s injunctions in carrying out the deed with the deed itself done according to the Islamic legal manner. This applies to all the tenets of Islam, and that is what the companions of Allah (swt)'s Messenger and the generations of believers that followed them did. That is what the successors of the Prophet (peace is upon him) the caliphs who ruled after him did, as well as those who came after them, may Allah (swt) reward them with the best of rewards.

The Muslims did not live a life of unbelief. And their way of life was never one of the ways of unbelief all the time the Islamic Ummah was in existence ever since it was founded by the Prophet's call to Islam and until the demise of the Islamic state in the year 1924. But today the Ummah in its totality is living under the umbrella of unbelief, and most of the Ummah does deeds for the sake of objectives without looking into its legality in Islam. And if one carries out a deed because it is an Islamic duty, he does not look for the manner defined by Islamic law. All of that is an abandonment of Islamic jurisprudence because obeying the tenets of Allah (swt) is realizing an aim from a deed in a way explained by the Islamic law on how to carry out that deed. Abandoning one of these two matters is in fact an abandonment of Allah (swt)'s laws and a carrying out of that deed in a manner contradictory to life direction of striving to be obedient to Allah (swt) and to earn His good pleasure.

This, emphatically is a manifest source of unbelief that no one can deny. It is the unbelief lived by the Islamic Ummah and it is the reason why it remains at the bottom, which is the quagmire in which it lives. All of this, made it imperative to ask our rising generations in this book ‘The son with his Father and Mother’, to undertake the procedure of faith and belief to be a part of every deed. By making sure that the deed to be carried out is a duty, or is recommended, allowed, forbidden or undesirable. If it were forbidden, to immediately refrain from doing it, if allowed leading to something forbidden one knows that it has become forbidden also refrains from doing it. If it was an obligation, to explore the lawful way to do it then immediately carry it out. If it was recommended or allowed and wanted to do it, he should also ask for the lawful way to do it and abide by it. If it was undesirable and he chose not to do it, Allah (swt) will reward him generously for that, but if he decides to do it, he should do so according to the Islamic lawful way.

If these generations were dutiful to their parents because this is a duty imposed by Allah (swt) and in the manner described by Allah (swt)'s Messenger (peace is upon him). A duty equals to Jihad in the religion of Allah (swt) if the Muslims do not need the participation of a lone dutiful son in the call to Islam through Jihad. It would become easy for them to pave their way in this life by adhering to Allah (swt)'s injunctions in all their worldly matters. Through this adherence, the Ummah will return, with the blessings of Allah (swt), the Mighty, the Supreme Power, to the path of regeneration which was lost for a period of time.

By this second book and the first ‘The wife with her husband’, the system of living within the family - A fortress fortified by Allah (swt) and His Prophet is complete – as per Allah (swt)'s guidance to us in His piety. It is a complete system sent from Allah (swt), the Exalted One, the Knowing, an integral part of the Islamic system of life with its joys and sorrows, achievements and failures, prosperity and calamities. A definite duty of every Muslim who believes in Allah (swt) as the Lord, Creator, Master of the Day of Judgment. And in the Qur'an, an honourable book relayed by the Most Gracious, Most Merciful upon the heart of Allah (swt)'s Prophet and Messenger, the faithful Muhammad (peace is upon him). A book which does not leave a small or a great matter in life without clarifying the laws connected to it, a book free of shortcomings and contradictions, complete in its laws, sent by Allah (swt) out of mercy for those who believe in Him. And a warning to all of those who oppose Him and disbelieve in Him; and every Muslim who believes that the Prophet and Messenger Muhammad, the son of Abdullah (peace is upon him) is the last of Allah (swt)'s messengers to all of mankind. He sent him as a mercy for all the people; whoever believe in him and in his message and abide by that message will escape Allah (swt)'s wrath and the torment of Hell.

He is who thinks or believes that to abide by the rules of the family, a fortress fortified by Allah (swt) and His Messenger, enrich him enough not to obey Allah (swt)'s rules in other matters of life, for Islam is an indivisible whole. And the one who believes that it can be divided into areas: one area in which it is not permissible for him to disobey Allah (swt), and an area in which it is permissible for him to disobey Allah (swt), is living with the mentality and psyche of Satan itself. That is because only Allah (swt) decrees what are Allah (swt)'s injunctions and what are His prohibitions. The one who decree what is allowed and what is prohibited, places himself in a seat in which he is equal to the Divine Power; I seek refuge with Allah (swt) from this unbelief which is the highest level of unbelief and the most contemptible to Allah (swt). Obedience and dutifulness are in fact obedience to Allah (swt) and dutifulness to Allah (swt)'s covenant. All of which is compliance with Allah (swt)'s injunctions, striving and endeavoring to earn Allah (swt)'s good pleasure, for the sake of earning His reward and justification to have His mercy and blessings. We ask Allah (swt) to have mercy on us and to guide us to His religion and help us know the lawful method He imposes in adhering to His Prophet's rules. We ask Him that the reader of Allah (swt)'s injunctions on obedience or dutifulness transforms into an adherent to Islamic thought and dogma. And a carrier of the call to Islam as a way of life by adhering to the rules of Allah (swt)'s laws in the way he lives, in forming his ideas and in the manner in which he carries out his deeds.

Comments

Idries said…
As the sheikh loves his parents, may Allah be mercifull to them, we love him for his life long endeavour to educate and raise us.
Anonymous said…
I read only the first 2 paragraphs and I already have a heaviness in my throat and glisten in my eye. Inshallah I hope to follow this series and ask the Almighty Allah to help me act on its advice. Barak allak feekom.

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